"What is Musical Beds?"
It isn't as much fun as it sounds. Basically the game starts once mom and dad have fallen soundly and deeply asleep. At this point the first child will somehow sense the window is now open, wake up, and crawl into bed with mom and dad. Once said child is situated in mom and dad's bed the next child will sense it is their turn and follow suite--and so on.
It is amazing how such little bodies can take up so much space. After I graduated from university, I purchased a king sized bed for more space, but it feels like a cot once you add 3 kids to it. Our 2 year old will lie flat on her back, arms and legs stretched out, and saw logs like a 300 pound trucker. It is actually quite amazing to watch--a dainty-little-blond-haired girl making a noise that shouldn't come out of her.
At this point in the game, one of the parents is usually forced out of the bed. My son likes to push me with his feet till I fall out of bed. Once out of bed, the parents will migrate to the kids' beds in the hopes of getting some much needed sleep. The other night I went and got in my son's bed, a couple hours later I feel him jump into the bed with me again and pull the same stunt! "I surrender!"
As an added element of danger, my kids are still at a stage where bed wetting can and does take place. This adds a "Russian Roulette" element to the game, which I don't think needs to be described in any more detail. But this gives the kids an unfair advantage in the game, and is one of the reasons I'll concede the bed in the middle of the night.
I miss the days when I could go to bed with my wife and wake up with the same person. If I do manage to stay in the bed, it is like waking up in some foreign hostel or college frat house after a wild party with bodies draped all over me. I've actually woken up and had a panic attack wondering, "WHERE AM I?!" The worst part is that I'm competitive, and I have yet to win a game of "Musical Beds!"
I want the game to stop, but I'm at a loss as to how to stop it. However, my male brain has come up with a few options.
- Chain the kids to their beds
- Lock the kids in their rooms
- Purchase some shock collars and set up a perimeter
- Three words, "Trained Guard Dog"
5 comments:
I feel your pain--and stiffness--I really do! DH will sleep thru all this stuff, and then be grumpy in the morning. But I can only take an hour or so sleeping in a compromised position, so I start returning intruders to their starting point in the middle of the night--which really defeats their plans when they wake up in the morning. After a few days they learn that they have to sleep in their own bed.
That's a good suggestion. I guess I'm going to have to be less lazy and just start putting the kids back in their beds.
The alternative is to start wetting my own bed to drive them out, but I'm not ready to go there yet.
Have you tried convincing them that there are monsters in mom and dad's room? I recommend running out of your room screaming, covered in fake blood.
We make certain that sleeping in our room is less pleasant than sleeping in their own rooms. If they come into our room, we put them on the floor with a blanket and pillow. Bed is off limits. Has worked pretty well. Though there are a few times I've resorted to sleeping in one of their beds, usually because someone is sick and screwing up the routine.
How about locking your door at night. Then they hit a dead end when they try for your bed.
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